Letter from Congress

Our family has been very blessed to receive so many condolonces from people in all walks of life - my grandpa was a loving, wonderful, and often influential man - here's a letter we received today from our Congresswoman.

Visit home....

Well I'm officially home and recovering.

The wake was on Thursday, lots of people came and it was great to see so many we haven't seen in years. My grandpa looked really handsome and lots of people sent flowers. Isabella broke down a lot. I felt just awful for her, it was great to see how much she loved my grandpa though and that she'll remember him. She went up to the casket and hugged him so hard. Dominic kept telling him to get up - "Gampa up" "Gampa". Isabella said how much she loved him and missed him. It was wrenching. I did ok... I broke down a couple times but luckily had plenty of arms to wrap around me. I went out with my cousins for dinner and drinks after the wake which was nice.

On Friday we had the funeral. It was a really nice service, I did the first reading from the book of Lamentations and broke down some more along wtih my mom who said "I just miss him so much." and we held eachother for awhile after the service. During Communion Isabella was bawling and my mom hugged her. Isabella was crying so hard you could hear her in the whole church. Her face was beet red and she was just a huge mess. I felt so horrible for her. I tried my best to stay strong. I spoke at the burial site along with my cousin and 2 of my aunts. We all spoke about different aspects of my grandpa which was nice. then we kissed the casket and said good-bye. After that we went to the church and had a reception with all the old friends and people from the old neighborhood.

Saturday, my cousin's daughter Mya (she's 5) had a basketball game so Mark and I took the kids to the game and then we went over to my cousin's house so the kids could play. My other cousin brought his kids over as well and they all had a great time together!!

I got my grandma's guitar that hung in my grandpa's room along with a belt buckle of a bull's head that I'm going to have drawn into a tat to put on my back in memory of my grandpa. I can hardly believe how much I miss him.

My grandfather...

Around 1am on the 18th we got a frantic phone call from my uncle... my grandfather who had long been fighting for his life lost his battle. While we know he's at peace now and is no longer suffering - it hurts more than I could have ever imagined. Every second feels as though my soul is being ripped out of my body. Every breath hurts, every beat of my heart feels more empty. I know time will begin to heal this, but it's no fun in the meantime. My grandfather was the kindest man anyone could ever know. He was a living saint - not in the do-no-wrong sense... more in the real life human sense. He was nowhere near perfect. But he was, to me, a wonder. Grandpa loved us like no other, but as a girl I had to prove myself to him. He didn't love girls less than boys, just different. When it became apparent that of my boy cousins around my age, I was as blessed with the skills to build things, to take them apart, and to help him with whatever needed doing - his admiration for me increased - I had impressed my grandfather. I adored him as much as he did me. Mi'jita. 'My little girl' he called me. Summers in Mexico were spent helping him fix up the farm. Feeding the chickens, collecting eggs. One summer he got my older cousin a baby Golden Eagle. My cousin got sick and was unable to take care of him though - so I took over the majority of the care of "Killer". I taught him to hunt. He let me rub and kiss his beak. Eventually he got too big and had to be released.

My grandfather could hold the most delicate ladybug in his hand and put it out of harm's way, or he could build a house with his own strength. He taught me balance between strength and gentleness. He loved his family more than anything - his devotion was apparent to each of us in different ways - his bond as unique as we all are. He loved us all differently but all the same and in some way he knew the time to let each of us go. I've seen my grandpa really cry only twice in my life, when my grandmother died, and when I moved to Florida. While I'm sure it was mostly that he would miss the children - it was wrenching to see him so upset. He gave us $20 to get some ice cream on the road, prayed over us, cried, and kissed us good-bye. I have millions of memories of my grandfather and for that I'm thankful. I can't imagine not having him - just his presence... we'll adapt somehow - thankful that a little piece of that saint lives in each of us.

From Russia with love....

A couple weeks ago my best friend Jessica and our old friend Justin who went to Russia with us and his friend Blake came to visit and do the whole Miami/South Beach thing. We had a blast! Dinner on Ocean Ave, then a little meandering to Wet Willy's, some dancing at Mango's, then a romp on the beach. It's a far cry from Tulsa and a good time was had by all. My darling hubby was good enough to hang out with the kids and let me spend some quality time with my old friends. To view the whole pics, right click then hit view image... it's worth it, trust me.







We'll definetly have to get together more often than once a decade.

Soccer Mom!

Isabella's started soccer and I am soooooo excited about it! Last week she got to play goalie and actually stopped a ball! She wants to get into cheerleading in the fall as well so we'll see how that goes - depends on soccer I guess. My handsome hubby is coaching her which gives them both some great time together. In addition to being a star athlete ;) Isabella was also just moved to the gifted reading program! We're very proud of her that she's doing so well in school... Here she is in her soccer uniform =) In the first one she looks like a gatorade commercial...

Getting ready for Christmas

it's almost that time...

In 7 short days the wild unwrapping will commence.

My children will manage to mangle in 2.4 seconds what has taken me (because my darling husband has't mastered the art of wrapping) 10 days and 60 woman hours to wrap and assemble. There's a bike to put together, toys to buy, things to sneak into the house, and of course the visit to the pet store because "Santa loves pets too" not to mention the stuffing of the stockings. True the cats aren't my favorite. Especially my youngest daughter's favorite cat, Kelly. She has a human name, our dear friend Toddicus ( www.toddicus.com ) loves the fact that our cat's name is so odd, but it was Juliana's choice. It was either Kelly or "cake" - I admit I pushed her towards Kelly as I didn't want to stand outside my house calling for cake. My kids each have an advent calendar - though Dominic - in true Dominic style ripped his apart and ate all the candy already. The girls get more and more anxious as the calendar counts down...

As much as I love this holiday for my kids, I admit I'm not incredibly excited about it for myself... it's been a hard year for my family and it's kind of hard to look forward to the festivities this year. My uncle's passing has been harder than I imagined it would have been. For all intents and purposes he, along with my grandfather were all I had as a father. I'm thankful I married a man who is an incredible father. The loss of my uncle so quickly - damn cancer... and the virtual loss of my grandfather has left a black shadow on the holiday for me. Had I known last year was going to be THE last year... I just wonder what I would have done differently, what I would have said. I remember standing outside with my uncle talking about Florida and what route I should take back home - he says to go through Atlanta instead of around it because everyone goes around it so coming home I did and I suspect I always will. When I was home during the summer I kissed my grandpa and said I love you and those are the last words we ever said to eachother. He's here physically but three strokes just a month before my uncle passed, has in truth made much communication unrealistic. Last week, my great-aunt (my grandpa's sister) passed away. When we were kids we would go to my grandpa's summer home in Mexico and play with our cousins, my great-aunt, Ana would make us treats - our older cousins would help us torture our younger cousins. She would teach us a few things here and there - first time I saw where chicken really came from... it's hard, knowing what's gone. But also makes us that much more thankful for what we do still have with us. So as hard as this holiday is to get into, I suspect it will become easier in time. I'm thankful I had the opportunity to speak at my uncle's funeral. My cousins thanked me, people said it was beautiful, but really, it was my last chance to say what I wanted to to my uncle, an incredible giant of a man with an even bigger heart, and I'm glad to have known him. Someday, I'll just wake up and it won't hurt as much. The joy will come back, little by little, and one day I won't get that hard knot in my throat when thinking about those who are gone. I'll smile and be thankful for having known them.